Steady Your Hearts…Choose Your Glory!!

i hadn’t been at the movies since i took a solo trip to the theater for “Wolf of Wallstreet”. i’m not sure how i managed to stay away for this long but I’m glad that dry spell is over. i think it was a good movie to break the rut too. “300: Rise of an Empire”. It won’t be winning any awards but it’s OK sometimes you just want to see some stuff blow up and bad assery at it’s finest.

i think it’s because at one point i was on the receiving end of one of those motivating speeches before going into battle that i can really appreciate those moments regardless of how cheesy it seems out of context of any real fear or danger for the audience.

obviously my battle was different and i was wearing just a tad bit more clothing but as any other warrior can tell you it’s not the size of your war that matters. the feeling just before it is what will forever stay with me. I guess it’s the overwhelming amount of time you hover in fight or flight mode that really does a number on how anything else will ever be experienced in our lives.

which brought me back to real life. i’ve expressed how my build up wears me down and i start seeing marathon in everything. well this movie really did a number on me. the first battle is actually the battle of marathon. the entire narrative of the movie is taking us towards Athens like that first marathon did so very long ago.

well that’s my two cents. i enjoyed the movie because i can check out when i walk through the door, if you’re already a fan then you will dig it. it’s not a pre-qual or a se-qual it’s more of a parallel story to the one of Leonidas and his 300.

#runstreak update. Day 100!!

2013 good bye for good.

i think i was sicker than i first thought when I woke up. I wrote 3 different checks today and by the end of the night I realized i wrote them all out for 3/6/13.

yup well into the 3rd month of the year and i’m still in 2013. 2 out of the 3 didn’t notice and apparently those deposits are on to the next step and now it’s to my bank. i’m crossing my fingers that no one else notices.

the 3rd party wants me to come by and either initial the original check or bring by new check with correct date. i felt pretty dumb about the whole thing, but as I searched the net to make sure it wasn’t as bad as I thought I realized plenty of people have and even farther into the year than i had done.

I need some more rest but as i sit here remember the words form a wiser soul: i have about 52 more hours to be sick. then I’ll rock it out on Sunday morning.

it’s taper week suckers…leave me alone.

it’s my 5th consecutive LA Marathon and 6th marathon over all. you’d think i’d have this under control by now. but noooo my nerves are still causing havok on my day. it’s taper week and without fail, i now feel like i’m fighting off a cold or something. if history is repeats itself i’ll be just fine on race day and after a mile or two i’ll settle into a nice race pace and the rest is as “easy” as a marathon can be.

yet it’s crazy to be dealing with this and now having to wait. truthfully I wish the race was tomorrow and that i can get it over with. & that’s what I hate. the day off I end up enjoying every bit of pain and the highs and lows are equally gratifying. yet leading up to it I’m a mess. anyone else have dreams or other panic inducing issues before race day?

ultimately I do believe that this week should be a restful one and that I should trust that the last 4 1/2 months of running will do the trick. I just have to trust that i’ve already done all that is needed and that stressing about it this week will only negatively affect my race. so i’m going to try and focus on day by day. tomorrow i have work so keeping busy does help. both Thursday & Friday I have only 1 mile planned. On the schedule it’s a ‘rest’ day but of course I’m still on my #runstreak and it will be day 99 and 100 respectively.

my plans for Saturday are still up in the air. i’m really torn about running on Friday logging 100 consecutive days of running and then resting on Saturday before the race or extend it right through my Sunday run and possibly ending at 102 (race day) I’m also through two months of running and completing the 365 days of running seems attainable. will i want to break it then? should i break it now so it’s not a huge deal?

 

they gave me a bedtime….your honor

i read an article today about a teenager who decided she would sue her parents. i have to admit that there is not a lot of information just yet. still the internet has taken it and ran away with it.

from “news” agency to news agency the descriptor of her has changed. one did identify her as an honor student but later on in the day she was identified as a cheerleader. why not mention the lacrosse team she was also a part of.

yes i’m sure there is some truth to the fact that she is a bit entitled and well moving in with a best friend who’s father is an attorney doesn’t hurt. (anyone but her parents). just like other parents fight to still have their kids on their insurance and as overall dependents until after college. why shouldn’t the same rules apply to her if she doesn’t want to be “emancipated”.

she is definitely used to a certain lifestyle and that is of there doing so regardless why should the “pay”. let us not forget the fact that their income is taken into account when determining her financial aid eligibility. so why not use those funds if the simple truth that they exist messes her up.

I made the claim on FB that things are fairly similar to a divorce where the wife, up until that point, was OK with financial arrangements but now that we talk about rules or other stipulations, the relationship is not as fun so they made an exit. In all honesty I really hope she wins and if it does start a trend I’m sorry. yet I’m confident that if my children sue me I deserve it because i raised some damn brats.

anyway enough rant for now. #runstreak update Day 97.

alright, alright, alright…..just keep living!

last night i, along with any other film buffs in the city if not the world watched as hollywood’s elite threw a party and told each other how awesome they were.

i think it’s pretty great because i do love the movies and i can’t keep a straight face telling my humble “war” stories let alone really sell some of the roles that last nights nominees were up for.

I take it for what it is entertainment. I don’t think that these people shouldn’t care about certain causes or fights. yet i don’t necessarily think that it’s the place to make statements of a political nature. I feel when one does it seems out of place and the message even is lost because of the opportunistic nature of it.

not to mention someone always seems to have a problem with what these actors say or don’t say. Jared Leto got it “right” this time by talking about people that have lived with the struggles he tried to portray. yet it seems he wasn’t specific enough and so still criticized for it. He mentioned AIDS by name. Matthew Mcconaughey on the other hand did not and then tried to make sense of what he though about 10 years ago and maybe even 10 years before that.

The same could be said for other actors and speeches but I chose to point those two out because it proof of being damned if you do and damned if you don’t. MM did thank God and so that group of people were happy. Is that what he didn’t mention AIDS or the LGTB community. I’ll add that I didn’t read that and if I mention that it’s just because thats how easy these media outlets make a story take off.

With the advent of social media stories spread even faster and i think with even less regard for truth. This group is mad and they should or shouldn’t be. I really think that it’s selfish of us to be upset about what some one said at their party that we were lucky enough to be invited to. Maybe they’ll start doing that in private next time. We would all sit there and read about what went on. If only to criticize what people wore.

I try not to be negative on my blog or on FB but today I guess I chose to vent here before doing so on FB. I figured if I wait till Tuesday all the Oscar buzz will be gone and my feed will go back to fighting about the other celebrities I mean loud mouthed politicians. I guess it could be worse. My friends could all be careless and not read or watch the news.

apperantly i live in paradise

beach, mountain, forest, or somewhere else entirely.

i think it is extremely difficult to choose so I’ll go with “somewhere else entirely”.

luckily I live in Los Angeles, I can and have started my day at the beach and worked my way through forested roads on my way to the mountains. as i type this i’m reminded that a week from today I will actually run across the city and go from mountain area through what was once forested land and end at the beach. i’m a little crazy because i’ll be doing it on foot but again i consider myself lucky to be able to do so.

i’m also very lucky that i can say that weather wise we’ll be looking at a gorgeous day for running. (knock on wood) our weekend of winter here in southern California was a crazy one. by wednesday it promises to be back in the 70′s and looking amazing once the dark clouds are gone. which makes me just a little concerned for those folks traveling from the east coast and acclimated to the polar vortex. it will feel like on oven compared to temperatures they’ve been dealing with.

as far as i’m a little optimistic about how the weather will turn out. this will be the 5th consecutive year I’ll be running the los angeles marathon. i’ve ran it through the heaviest rains in recent history and also one of the driest days we’ve had in a long time. so here’s to the goldie locks of environments not to hot, not to cold, but just right.

accountability is key

as far as writing prompts are concerned i’ve seen the one about writing a letter to your past self about a 100 times. my past self is kind of annoyed at hearing how things will be.

today a prompt i found had me writing to someone in the future. i guess i should write about how i hope things are now(then). i of course started to write because i know exactly how i want things to be. notice i immediately thought of writing to myself and not my children. i’m not ready to admit that i won’t be here for their forever.

as i started to type a letter to myself and wrote down things complimenting the new house or success at work. a fear like none other came over me. what if those things aren’t real just yet. how far in the future do i need to send this letter for that to be the case. then i was even more critical at the fact that i’m not sure if those things will ever happen.

so i’ve decided that the letter should not be for a younger Jose who wouldn’t listen to reason anyway. lets face it, that’s what got to us to where we are now and although I know it’s where we need to be on this journey of mine it’s not. i can’t write to future Jose because of reasons already explained above. so this letter really needs to be me now.

Hey Jose,

it’s almost midnight again, you really do have to start posting to your blog a lot earlier than “almost tomorrow”. so i need you to understand that i’m in no way complaining about how things are going lately. life is better than where you were just last year. i just need you to understand that if you want things to be the same or somewhat better then you’re good. yet if your goal is to be a 10 times better then ¬†you need to make a change. you need to make changes in how you perceive accountable.

I want you to lose some weight. I’ve been nice and getting by on just your running as you can see is not cutting it. i read somewhere that you should let the time something will take discourage you, because the time will pass no matter what. so just start eating better. as well as posting your runs maybe you should start an online journal of what you eat. when forced to look back daily or weekly at what you eat it has to have an impact on the autopilot that just says go.

I need you to continue writing but if and when you feel stuck ,do not be shy about turning to classic pen and paper.

always w/ you,

Jose Callejas