Take me to the candy, I mean book store.

I purchased a few books today.

At least that’s how I’m telling it. If you talk to my wife about it I may have brought home the entire bookstore and she didn’t want any part of it. She was flabbergasted at the register and I was waiting for her to start asking questions about the library as she does from time to time. Today is gone and it didn’t go anywhere so I’m rushing to put the books away and I might have made it with out a scratch.

I started to think about my trip, and the damage done. I have never really been against the library trips, but I do appreciate owning a “few” books. So I think I might look for the library card and if I truly love a book I might then go buy it. Using that method it will have to be an amazing book to warrant a trip to the book store. Either that or I need to make more “smaller” trips so it’s not all in one bang.

I won’t go through the entire list but I do have to mention “Unbroken”. I’m beyond excited to watch the movie later this year but I was so saddened about not having heard about this incredible man; Louis Zamperini. This is what prompted the trip to the store. I have no idea how all the other books made it into my bag. I also grabbed books for the boy and girl.

I’ve been reading a book a week and I actually think the rate at which I’m reading at has increased quite a bit. So I will read “Unbroken” next week starting Wednesday. So if you haven’t read it yet, hurry up and pick up a copy before a spoiler filled post sometime next week. Fine, no spoilers. You should still go buy this ASAP and read what I know will be an inspiring journey.

what a shot

we can’t have all great days.

just like boxers or fighters scramble so that the last thing the judges see is there effort.

this day ended in a kind of a crazy scramble.

long and productive day.

a short run for day 73 of #runstreak.

then a weird argument with the boy, right before bed.

will he remember dad ‘being mean’

I know I will remember him not being appreciative of everything else he enjoyed during the day.

enough rambling for today. I sent him to bed and we spoke about understanding where he was wrong and tomorrow being a new day. I guess we’ll see how tomorrow goes.

I’ll be running farther so at least that’s going to be better.

Sad day

This weekend yet another person lost his battle with addiction. As is the case with any celebrity death it’s now been analyzed and repeated over and over. I for one always wonder the state of mind these people need to be in to get to that point.

I also wonder how long ago they may have ended it all if they had to put up with some of the struggles everyday folks have put up with. I’ve always heard that we all have our own crosses to bear but I’m still confused.

This man did not go hungry. This man was a very celebrated actor and although the parts he played were raw and now as an afterthought probably very demanding of his sanity. Yet I go back to the fact that he was not alone and it was very specific the results of an addiction that ultimately did him in.

I’ve always wondered if I’m not addicted to any substance because I know better or simply because I don’t have the disposable income to have that type of addiction. I can probably point to a few different things that I have been addictive too and in the grand scheme of things have been as equally devastating to my day/life.

I tried to ween myself off but ultimately it did not work until I cut it out cold turkey and stop rationalizing everything. It seemed I always thought it was under control. Until I learned that even a glimpse of an open door would mean it being kicked wide open and being in trouble all over again. I’m so glad everyday that passes that my vices are under control but it worries me when I hear talk of an addiction being ever present.

PSH was 23 years sober. Yet something knocked him off the wagon and the drug of choice was now too much for his body to handle.

 

Happy Anniversary!

I think I like how I feel. I’m tired as a dog and I wouldn’t have it any other way. It means I will sleep like a baby.

Yesterday morning as I mentioned before started with 10 miles. When I headed to bed I actually thought that I may have been a bit too ambitious and ultimately would pay for that during the 20 miler I had scheduled for today.

My run went well and with a start time of 4:30 am I was done a little after 8:00 am. With the entire day still ahead of me to celebrate not only my 12 year anniversary but Super Bowl 48 as well.

Well one was fantastic and the other not so well if you really wanted the Broncos and Peyton to have a good game.

I’m sure you’ll read plenty of commentary and analysis about the game. So I’ll just say Happy Anniversary to the Curly one and try to type my life away tomorrow morning instead of trying to stay u[ even one more minute.

I hope atleast some of you are Seahawk fans.

Also I think I may be too old for day drinking or drinking after 20 miles wasn’t the best idea. A couple of Margaritas in and I was lit.

Bring it February

Wow January is gone. It seems like just yesterday we were all opening Xmas gifts and listening to Auld lang syne. Right?

So how’s 2014 treating you all so far? I can say that I feel at peace with how things are working out for me. (more importantly for my family)

As far as my challenges/goals(resolutions) are concerned I’m happy with my batting average. I took on several and well I figured if even one of them stuck through out the whole month I could carry that momentum into February and then some.

So reading: 4 out 25 books already read. As of typing this about halfway done with book 5. I’ve been even thinking about pushing the bar a little higher. Or maybe I should wait till I get to the bar.

Running: I kept my streak alive and today marked day 65. The mileage total for January alone is 130 miles and since the streak & more than double that since the streak started back on Thanksgiving Day. I’m 35 days away from the LA Marathon so at the very least I’m pushing the streak goal out to 100 days.

Drinking: I kept it dry. I can’t make this one last through February because I will celebrate both my 12 year anniversary and my 33 birthday with some alcoholic beverages. I’ll go back to dry in March (not an easy task with St. Paddy’s mid month. Then in April back to the booze. Ah I see a pattern, and I like it.

Some that didn’t fare that well. Daily picture about being grateful. Daily writing in personal journal. (With that said I’ve been able to write here to you folks daily everyday of January).

So here’s to hoping I can keep all those going for February. Especially since it’s a short month. Bring it February

 

She was the strongest woman I ever met

Dearly departed – Write your own eulogy.

I’m curious to see what other people wrote for their own eulogy. I don’t think I can write one for myself right now. Perhaps one day, but not today. It did get me thinking about what people (my family) would say about me if I died today.

So instead the ‘good-bye’, I’d like to write(give) is the one for my maternal grandmother, I guess you could say I wasn’t happy with the one that was given on that sad day and there’s so much I wish I had said to her.

Good bye grandma. For the rest of my life I will live with the heavy weight of not having said that to you before you left us. For so very long we prepared ourselves for this good bye and yet no one was ready.

I was running my 3rd marathon when we got news that you were ill. It wasn’t too long after that when the call came out to come say good bye. I wrestled with the idea and knew that I would live with my decision for ever. yet I now know that’s probably why I chose to stay away. I will forever live with that and in turn your memory will stay with me forever.

You were part of my life since I have reason. In our little town (in a big city) Atwater, you were everybody’s grandma. Everything to everyone. I remember you always said that you were completely OK with aging. Every part of your life an adventure. You may not have enjoyed your childhood because circumstances cut it short but you definitely made it a point to live life to the fullest.

You enjoyed your children and the baby in your family ended up being my mom. Making me and my siblings the youngest grandchildren. You also lived with us so I don’t care what anybody says I know we were your favorite. Even when your mind started failing you. You would forget your children but never did you forget my face. You met my son and your interaction with him always made me wish I was a little boy with me and that our good bye wasn’t so near.

It breaks my heart that you never met my little girl. Yet it warms my heart when she makes faces that remind everyone of you. I can only hope that she grows up to be a strong woman like you were. You may not have come from money but no one had more class than you.

___________

I have to stop for now and not sure I can continue this because I can’t begin to explain how much I miss her. Yet will publish this as is. I could probably keep this going forever so maybe some other time.

 

Rise and shine, is it 4:30 yet…..?

it’s 10 at night and I’m still after started this day quite early. I’m afraid tomorrow will be an even earlier start.

I had quite a day. It kicked off with a nice run around my neighborhood. I kicked off off my run just a few minutes after 6:30 am. Tomorrow I hope to step off by 4:30 am.

Tomorrow I’ll have a running partner, which should make the 20 miles easier to bear. It definitely got me thinking about this mornings run. It was 7:30 before I ran across the first person. When I finally did, I said good morning. I was a bit confused about the smile I received since it was what I thought kind of in a mocking manner.

They were glad about my almost having been run over. Or perhaps relieved. Either way I couldn’t help but wonder about #megsmiles it’s the reason many more people were up and running early on a Saturday morning. Her time on this planet ended by a drunk driver.

I felt a deep sense of loss with out ever having met her. My heart nearly stops every time I have a close call. The thought of her fear right before impact was terrifying. I wondered how her time was between impact and ultimately losing her life.

My heart goes out to her family. Husband and to her 3 children left behind.

So be careful my friends and keep running but be mindful because you can’t win a battle with a car. Enjoy your run but look up and make eye contact with drivers when ever you can.