Steady Your Hearts…Choose Your Glory!!

i hadn’t been at the movies since i took a solo trip to the theater for “Wolf of Wallstreet”. i’m not sure how i managed to stay away for this long but I’m glad that dry spell is over. i think it was a good movie to break the rut too. “300: Rise of an Empire”. It won’t be winning any awards but it’s OK sometimes you just want to see some stuff blow up and bad assery at it’s finest.

i think it’s because at one point i was on the receiving end of one of those motivating speeches before going into battle that i can really appreciate those moments regardless of how cheesy it seems out of context of any real fear or danger for the audience.

obviously my battle was different and i was wearing just a tad bit more clothing but as any other warrior can tell you it’s not the size of your war that matters. the feeling just before it is what will forever stay with me. I guess it’s the overwhelming amount of time you hover in fight or flight mode that really does a number on how anything else will ever be experienced in our lives.

which brought me back to real life. i’ve expressed how my build up wears me down and i start seeing marathon in everything. well this movie really did a number on me. the first battle is actually the battle of marathon. the entire narrative of the movie is taking us towards Athens like that first marathon did so very long ago.

well that’s my two cents. i enjoyed the movie because i can check out when i walk through the door, if you’re already a fan then you will dig it. it’s not a pre-qual or a se-qual it’s more of a parallel story to the one of Leonidas and his 300.

#runstreak update. Day 100!!

2013 good bye for good.

i think i was sicker than i first thought when I woke up. I wrote 3 different checks today and by the end of the night I realized i wrote them all out for 3/6/13.

yup well into the 3rd month of the year and i’m still in 2013. 2 out of the 3 didn’t notice and apparently those deposits are on to the next step and now it’s to my bank. i’m crossing my fingers that no one else notices.

the 3rd party wants me to come by and either initial the original check or bring by new check with correct date. i felt pretty dumb about the whole thing, but as I searched the net to make sure it wasn’t as bad as I thought I realized plenty of people have and even farther into the year than i had done.

I need some more rest but as i sit here remember the words form a wiser soul: i have about 52 more hours to be sick. then I’ll rock it out on Sunday morning.

it’s taper week suckers…leave me alone.

it’s my 5th consecutive LA Marathon and 6th marathon over all. you’d think i’d have this under control by now. but noooo my nerves are still causing havok on my day. it’s taper week and without fail, i now feel like i’m fighting off a cold or something. if history is repeats itself i’ll be just fine on race day and after a mile or two i’ll settle into a nice race pace and the rest is as “easy” as a marathon can be.

yet it’s crazy to be dealing with this and now having to wait. truthfully I wish the race was tomorrow and that i can get it over with. & that’s what I hate. the day off I end up enjoying every bit of pain and the highs and lows are equally gratifying. yet leading up to it I’m a mess. anyone else have dreams or other panic inducing issues before race day?

ultimately I do believe that this week should be a restful one and that I should trust that the last 4 1/2 months of running will do the trick. I just have to trust that i’ve already done all that is needed and that stressing about it this week will only negatively affect my race. so i’m going to try and focus on day by day. tomorrow i have work so keeping busy does help. both Thursday & Friday I have only 1 mile planned. On the schedule it’s a ‘rest’ day but of course I’m still on my #runstreak and it will be day 99 and 100 respectively.

my plans for Saturday are still up in the air. i’m really torn about running on Friday logging 100 consecutive days of running and then resting on Saturday before the race or extend it right through my Sunday run and possibly ending at 102 (race day) I’m also through two months of running and completing the 365 days of running seems attainable. will i want to break it then? should i break it now so it’s not a huge deal?

 

alright, alright, alright…..just keep living!

last night i, along with any other film buffs in the city if not the world watched as hollywood’s elite threw a party and told each other how awesome they were.

i think it’s pretty great because i do love the movies and i can’t keep a straight face telling my humble “war” stories let alone really sell some of the roles that last nights nominees were up for.

I take it for what it is entertainment. I don’t think that these people shouldn’t care about certain causes or fights. yet i don’t necessarily think that it’s the place to make statements of a political nature. I feel when one does it seems out of place and the message even is lost because of the opportunistic nature of it.

not to mention someone always seems to have a problem with what these actors say or don’t say. Jared Leto got it “right” this time by talking about people that have lived with the struggles he tried to portray. yet it seems he wasn’t specific enough and so still criticized for it. He mentioned AIDS by name. Matthew Mcconaughey on the other hand did not and then tried to make sense of what he though about 10 years ago and maybe even 10 years before that.

The same could be said for other actors and speeches but I chose to point those two out because it proof of being damned if you do and damned if you don’t. MM did thank God and so that group of people were happy. Is that what he didn’t mention AIDS or the LGTB community. I’ll add that I didn’t read that and if I mention that it’s just because thats how easy these media outlets make a story take off.

With the advent of social media stories spread even faster and i think with even less regard for truth. This group is mad and they should or shouldn’t be. I really think that it’s selfish of us to be upset about what some one said at their party that we were lucky enough to be invited to. Maybe they’ll start doing that in private next time. We would all sit there and read about what went on. If only to criticize what people wore.

I try not to be negative on my blog or on FB but today I guess I chose to vent here before doing so on FB. I figured if I wait till Tuesday all the Oscar buzz will be gone and my feed will go back to fighting about the other celebrities I mean loud mouthed politicians. I guess it could be worse. My friends could all be careless and not read or watch the news.

apperantly i live in paradise

beach, mountain, forest, or somewhere else entirely.

i think it is extremely difficult to choose so I’ll go with “somewhere else entirely”.

luckily I live in Los Angeles, I can and have started my day at the beach and worked my way through forested roads on my way to the mountains. as i type this i’m reminded that a week from today I will actually run across the city and go from mountain area through what was once forested land and end at the beach. i’m a little crazy because i’ll be doing it on foot but again i consider myself lucky to be able to do so.

i’m also very lucky that i can say that weather wise we’ll be looking at a gorgeous day for running. (knock on wood) our weekend of winter here in southern California was a crazy one. by wednesday it promises to be back in the 70’s and looking amazing once the dark clouds are gone. which makes me just a little concerned for those folks traveling from the east coast and acclimated to the polar vortex. it will feel like on oven compared to temperatures they’ve been dealing with.

as far as i’m a little optimistic about how the weather will turn out. this will be the 5th consecutive year I’ll be running the los angeles marathon. i’ve ran it through the heaviest rains in recent history and also one of the driest days we’ve had in a long time. so here’s to the goldie locks of environments not to hot, not to cold, but just right.

to 365 or not to 365

tomorrow is the last day of February.

i’ve started my 8th book and just like I’m considering taking a break from my #runstreak (after the marathon), I’m thinking ofs taking a full week off of reading.

I don’t know that I like the pressure of having to do something everyday for any period of time, let along for a whole year.

are any of you on any kind of streaks. have you ever done anything for a full year? how many days in a row have you ran? What’s the most # of books you’ve read in year?

 

I need a cookie…

my name is Jose and I’m about to devour a bag of oreos.

this post is so that when I feel like crap with in a half an hour and more so tomorrow I can remember why. I did not buy these oreos today, I bought them over a week ago and have been strong. I planned to eat maybe one a day until race day and then really dig into them after the race. I’m talking maybe 2 glasses of milk and really taking my time with each cookie. Then I had a set back Sunday. (not really but that’s what it feels like today) I overslept for my run so I did the minimum 1 mi. Today I got out on the road so late that again it was 1 mi. So all I need right now is some milk and cookies and I’m going to put today behind me.

i’m already past 100 miles for the month but still hope that after tomorrow I can stick to training fully for another 2 weeks. If I can do that then I’ll be a easy with myself about possible breaking the streak. I’m torn though because it’s the only thing that has kept me going out there when all I want to do is hit the rack.

Enough stalling this is going down. cookie monster mode commencing now.

for what it’s worth, I think as long as I’m listening to some music I won’t feel half as bad as I imagine.

Take me to the candy, I mean book store.

I purchased a few books today.

At least that’s how I’m telling it. If you talk to my wife about it I may have brought home the entire bookstore and she didn’t want any part of it. She was flabbergasted at the register and I was waiting for her to start asking questions about the library as she does from time to time. Today is gone and it didn’t go anywhere so I’m rushing to put the books away and I might have made it with out a scratch.

I started to think about my trip, and the damage done. I have never really been against the library trips, but I do appreciate owning a “few” books. So I think I might look for the library card and if I truly love a book I might then go buy it. Using that method it will have to be an amazing book to warrant a trip to the book store. Either that or I need to make more “smaller” trips so it’s not all in one bang.

I won’t go through the entire list but I do have to mention “Unbroken”. I’m beyond excited to watch the movie later this year but I was so saddened about not having heard about this incredible man; Louis Zamperini. This is what prompted the trip to the store. I have no idea how all the other books made it into my bag. I also grabbed books for the boy and girl.

I’ve been reading a book a week and I actually think the rate at which I’m reading at has increased quite a bit. So I will read “Unbroken” next week starting Wednesday. So if you haven’t read it yet, hurry up and pick up a copy before a spoiler filled post sometime next week. Fine, no spoilers. You should still go buy this ASAP and read what I know will be an inspiring journey.

mentiroso

cheat: “to gain an advantage on a rival or foe” ~ it was a beautiful lie.

what a story. one that’s come full circle for me. many years ago i read and felt extremely inspired by the book “it’s not about the bike: my journey back to life”.

I sang it’s praises to anyone who would listen. it meant so much for me: his perseverance in the face of the disease and then to come back from that and excel in an endurance sport. Other than sparse memories of my father watching the peloton on tv, it was the first I’ve really felt intrigued by what it meant to put yourself through “pain” for fun. It would take several years after that for me to run “far”. Even longer to jump on a bike and try to even mimic an idol like Lance.

sure enough as I made a transition from just running – to completing my first olympic distance triathlon Lance was once again kicking but this time in Iron man races around the world. Something i’m sure just raised more questions about his fitness and his level of awesomeness. I still just told people what a “bad ass” lance was and about the traits I had read about in the book that made him so special. Surely it wasn’t doping.

Not to long after that I sat watching Oprah online and listening to him say that he cheated. Well not in those words because I still feel it was a non apology. He justifies it by simply saying it was the only way to compete. It really threaten to hurt the way I felt about him. Yet it’s hard because he obviously still had to do plenty of work to stay competitive and as horrible as we can imagine it to be. You can’t fake all the dedication to even go through with whatever horrors he had to.

Yes we can’t ignore the lengths he went through to cover up that lie. By his own admission it wasn’t lying over and over it was always to cover up that initial lie. Isn’t that human nature: self preservation. I don’t think it automatically makes him a psychopath. Am I too human then because as straight an arrow as I try to be, I can admit to not always making the right decision in a societal point of view. I also then remember that he didn’t actually wrong me.

Tonight I sat through the entire documentary “The Armstrong Lie”. It was tough at times to watch especially with great contrast between both people side by side. The Lance denying countless accusations or the Lance that is admitting it with out any good reason to or any show of real emotion behind it. I plan to reread the book. Perhaps with the new lens I often mention.

The ball game

I’ve made it clear how much music really takes things to another level for me.

I’m not sure how i missed this song the first 2 times I watched this movie. My only guess is that the first two times were just so overwhelmingly emotional heavy that I was just exhausted at the end of the movie to notice the awesome message coming at me at the end.

tonight was the third time and by the end of the movie my family was all down for the night. The baby was sleeping in her crib. The boy was done fighting the sand man and was dreaming for sure. My wife had kissed me good night and so I was left with absolutely no distractions to enjoy or bare the weight of the hate coming Jackie’s way.

At the end of it all it began to play and I thought it was “take me out to the ball game” with the organ going and all. What struck me as odd was that after looking the song up on iTunes and youtube I realized that the lyrics are actually pretty religious. Something I’m not and have had to defend for various reasons. Never the less I enjoyed the peace the song brought and wonder if it was just the style or her (Sister Winona Carr) voice.

Ultimately I decided it doesn’t really matter what I think and that you all should help me decide. Now take a listen and let me know what you think.